The stress we face at work and home has been increasing only over the past 15 years, not that it was much less before. Because of the late hours, working lunches, extended working weekends, and family responsibilities, it's very difficult for folks to find the time to wind down. What aggravates the problem is that many people are caught up in jobs they don't really like doing and delivering results by putting in extra hours like never before.
This has increased over the past four years because the lockdown and the mandatory work from home policy blurred the lines between work and home. Achieving work-life balance seems to be an impossible dream, for most of us.
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For clarity - here's a basic definition of work-life balance from Google - "the division of one's time and focus between working and family or leisure activities."
With organizations competing heavily for growth, employees at all levels of organization are being pushed harder than ever before. Some days, you feel it's better to stay in bed and switch off the wi-fi and phone.
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Worse - it can lead to a feeling that you are stuck (due to a variety of reasons, particularly financial reasons).
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There's a lot of literature about work-life balance available online and in books. Managing the stress that one goes through (at home or at work) is a key theme. Meditation, diet and exercise are frequently prescribed and they are all effective to the extent that the employee is able to carve out the time to do it diligently. Most don't work on the root cause.
I also like the idea from Marcus Buckingham of doing more of what you love and less of what you don't enjoy. This would have the effect of unbalancing yourself in the direction of the things that you enjoy doing. Of course, easier said than done, but nevertheless, it is definitely worth attempting. A lot of artists, athletes, business and corporate folk have managed to do this. The example of Mr. Piyush Pandey from the Advertising world comes to mind.
I've an additional viewpoint to offer.
When I was in the corporate world, there were many days when we worked late in the office, leaving only around 8 pm. I used to sing regularly with my church choir at the time. We would have practices on two weekdays that began and ended late since the singers were all working people. I recall many days when I attended practices though I was extremely tired from the office day.
Instead of being exhausted on returning home, I would find that I was energized. I checked with other singers who also confirmed similar feelings and experiences. Subsequently, I spoke to other people at work, asking them how they unwound from a tiring day or week. Each of them had different methds or activities - from listening to music, playing with their pets, going for a long walk or even a jog at night, giving attention to the family members (including kids), working on their hobbies maybe twice or thrice a week, each of which contributed to improving the way they felt about themselves.
Whatever activity they chose allowed them to use some of their talents that weren't being used sufficiently (or at all) at work. Sometimes, of course, there was a similarity.
Here's my understanding of this:
We humans are a mix of structured and creative ways of being. Most of us prefer to have a structured routine on a daily basis, with a few minor changes, because it gives us a sense of comfort.
All of us are endowed with both skills for both structure and creativity. Some are wired more towards one side, and our upbringing, education and circumstances (environment) along with our own decisions play a major role in which side we end up using, along with the line of work we choose.
However, most of our jobs are demanding in a manner that requires us to work in an extremely structured manner in a strongly regulated internal (within the organization) environment that interfaces and interacts with an external environment where regular flux is the name of the game. This flux increases our work pressure and our stress. It is compounded by the reality that a solution that worked yesterday (or earlier) will not work sufficiently or as effectively today, and may be completely irrelevant tomorrow. Our jobs also require us to spend extended hours at work on a daily basis, and with remote work, the lines between home and work are quite blurred. This makes it difficult for us to switch off from work and, has increased the amount of stress we go through.
So what should we be doing to balance ourselves? Here are my suggestions:
- Spend time knowing (really getting to know) your strengths. You can do this by using a validated psychometric assessment, hire a Strengths Strategy Coach like me and / or getting feedback from people who know you well enough to be honest with you.
- Think about the hobbies where you spent a lot of time while growing up. Identify those hobbies where time just flew by while you were doing it and enjoying it. This would mean that these hobbies are aligned with your strengths.
- Look for opportunities to bring at least two of those hobbies into your current schedule. This could be daily, weekly, fortnightly. These hobbies shouldn't be easy and should possess a degree of challenge that is sufficient for you to access the Flow Zone.
- Any activity that is less than that frequency would not help you to reduce stress much. Some of my friends who still make time to play football or other physical sports. Others cook meals for their family on Sundays. I sing in my church choir at least twice a month.
- Guard this schedule zealously and jealously, as much as you can.
- Figure out how you could be paid money to do one or more the things you enjoy, so that it becomes your fulltime career and job, instead of something in your spare time. I have helped my clients make this happen for them and they have more satisfied careers and less stressed lives.
- Initiate a discussion with your reporting manager and HR to plan how to use your strengths more in your job. I know this is difficult, but it's worth a try.
By doing these things, you stand a better chance of balancing yourself and achieving your work-life balance.
In the corporate world, the HR team and line managers can look at hiring people based on their strengths so that they will be more engaged while at work.
Want to know more about Balancing Yourself by Using Your Strengths or Identifying a Career based on your strengths? Write to me at ryanbbarretto@hotmail.com or call on +919820155778 for a discussion.
